The Mirage of Acceptance
Chasing people. Why do we chase after people who don’t care about us? I’ve spent so much time in the past (even years) chasing after people that I found out later that they don’t care about me. You may have done it, too. We have constantly worried about what these people think of us. These are people who may be in leadership roles, people who you thought were your mentors, friendships that you thought were special, and people you thought would be there for you when you needed them. This chase could come in the form of a presentation, a Facebook post, a text message (or several), or a phone call (several there too). You always call or text first, always seeking approval (or likes) and trying to make an impression. You are never reciprocated. But—we still do it.
The Strength in Ignoring the Crowd
In my humble little world, I have discovered that there are only two types of friendships or relationships. People who make you feel "less than" and people who make you feel "more". Constantly worrying about what other people think can be a full-time job if you let it. My favorite author, Andy Andrews, once said, “God rarely uses a person who cares about what other people are thinking.” I have had that quote hanging up in my house for years because I try to remember it and reinforce it in my children all the time. We are reminded in Proverbs 29:25: The fear of human opinion disables; trusting in God protects you from that. I will be a little honest: every time I write a new blog, I get a little nervous that someone won't like it. However, Michelle always reminds me that this is bigger than us, that God put this on our hearts to share with our little group of followers, hopefully spreading to some new subscribers and eventually increasing to an internet sensation to spread the Gospel. We are doing this for Jesus, not likes. Not everyone has to like us, we don't always have to follow all the rules. So ladies, don't stay where you aren't valued! Don't change who you are to blend in! Don't make yourself small to make someone else look bigger! Shine your light for the world to see!
Breaking the Rules
Jesus, well, He liked to break the rules. He made it a point to break them. He made people uncomfortable on purpose. When religious leaders accused Jesus of breaking the Sabbath because His disciples plucked some grain and ate it as they walked through a field, He said: “The Sabbath was made for man, and not man for the Sabbath. Therefore the Son of Man is also Lord of the Sabbath” (Mark 2:27-28). I love that about my Jesus!
There are so many accounts of Jesus breaking the rules, and I will paraphrase here for the sake of time. Jesus broke the rules again in John 4:9 by talking to a Samaritan woman and in Matthew 12:11-13 healing a man on the Sabbath in the synagogue of all places; He touched the untouchable in Luke 5:12-16. Jesus frequently made scandalous statements in John 6:54 and Mark 2:5, and He hung out with people the religious society stayed away from in Mark 2:16. Even His enemies accused Him of not caring what others think in Mark 12:14. So as I read each one of those scriptures I hear, "Erica, don't be afraid of what anyone else thinks, write your stories, tell the world about Me, and press the button to publish your blog!"
Funeral People
Michelle and I often talk about how important our circle is, how tight we must keep it, and circle it in prayer often. This circle is our innermost family and loved ones, who are held dear to our hearts. However, I have my Funeral People, too.
My sis sent me a TikTok a while back, and I can’t remember the gist of all of it to give the lady credit or her name, but it was pretty awesome. If I can find it again, I will update this post. The TikTok lady asked why we worry about what people think of us; we should only care about what our "funeral people" think! She said to go out and find your funeral people. This is not just the people who are going to show up for your service if you die. No. I’m talking about finding the people that are going to be there for you when things go completely south. People who show up when tragedy strikes and you are mindlessly mopping your floor because you don’t know what else to do and make you stop and sit down and talk to them. The person who shows up after all the hoopla of services a week later and brings your favorite banana pudding because they know that's what you need. The ones that bring you Mexican because they know you don't want to go out but you need that queso- you know who you are. The person that doesn’t just say they’ll pray for you but comes to your house and actually prays for you. Funeral people. When my dad died, these were examples of my funeral people. Your funeral people will be only a handful; maybe you can count them on one hand, and that's okay. I care about what they think; they care about what I think, too.
Jesus said in John 13: 34-35 A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, son you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are My disciples if you love one another.
Unapologetically yours,
Erica